It should have been easy.
I’d been near there a hundred times
but there was something about the day
that turned everything on it’s head
The wheel fell off the tram.
I waited an hour for another one
which didn’t come. Resigned to
being late I waited some more
and then walked along the shores
of Malaran and on to Sodermalm.
The street, I could find
but the numbers were elusive.
I went into a building and
entered an Escher like world
of staircases and doorways
which lead to abandoned
and derelict rooms.
I heard laughter and
tried to find it but found
myself disgorged on the
street. The day and my wits
half gone.
Lovely rhythm and subtle rhymes… The short lines work really well matching the meaning… Maybe the line endings could be jiggled around here and there… Peter Sansom suggests that ending a line with a verb can work well, enticing the reader to move on to the next line. On another occasion he said that if you can take a half-breath at the end of a line then it’s working. I don’t know if these two suggestions work well together!
and we are left with so many questions?????? The title has a great ring about it.